A different kind of work.

When I say different, I mean relationship wise. Turns out I had forgotten how much work and effort you have to put into a relationship. 

But hear me out, I'm not saying its a drag, if you've been in a relationship you know its not.

I guess when it comes to relationships, its all about picking out that person you're willing to work things out with, 

willing to fight with

fight for

cry for

work for

live for

smile for

die for.

Sometimes people have to take a few stepping stones to get to the right person; amazing person.

Chances are he'll never read this post, but I have to say that words hardly describe how thankful I am for such a caring person walking into my life. Someone who has always seen me as a beautiful person, even at my ugliest. Someone who has never judged me, always helped me, and still been there even when I pushed him as far away as you could push someone. 

So this post is for my babe, Steven.

Thank you, so much, for just loving me the way I am. 

xoxo

-Dearest Lovely

 

Holy moly, i certainly have a lack of consistancy when it comes to blogging.
FINALLY GRADUATED.
ya know, people say high school is soooo hard and sucky. But they also say its worth it in the end. To finally walk across that stage a graduated woman made me want to throw my hands up and let my scream be heard across the auditorium. It almost still doesnt feel real.
For those of you struggling out there, keep your head up, and push forward. I know how hard it is and how easy it is to give up. 
BUT YOU CAN DO IT.
Even if you switch to a different school, to packets, to half drop out, to adult post high school. What matters is that you graduated, and you earned that diploma one way or another, SO CELEBRATE!
 I'm so thankful for my parents pushing me and making me go, especially when I didnt want too. Also to my friends for your love and support, I love you guys, 
Thank You

-Dearest Lovely 

Right here in my open hands.

And maybe i'm just a little girl, a little girl with great big plans <3

SO. Lots of stuff a happenin! I'm getting ready to graduate! SO STOKED.
It's really hitting home though. I mean this is where I'm really gonna have to move on and start a whole new life.
BUT on the brightside, my best friend Madi and I are going to have THE BEST GRAD TRIP EVER.
Her parents got us a nice room in a lodge in Zion National Park <3
Which I am SO thankful for! Where gonna hike and tan and swim and hike more and be super awesome for graduating :]

-Dearest Lovely

I HAVE DECIDED

SO
I think I'm officially deciding to go to Paul Mitchell School of Cosmetology :]
I wanna be a makeup artist, makeup is such a intriguing thing to me and it's what I love to do! I mean what a better way to live your life doing what you love AND getting paid for it! It's time for me to spread my wings and kick butt :]
Well...as soon as I graduate.

-Dearest Lovely

dreams come true right?

I have a class that I'm currently taking, its a little gem called "Adult Roles"
AND I caught wind that we have to plan our OWN weddings....erm.
I have sooo many ideas so I'm gonna share :]
P.S my amazing cousin just got engaged! love her!

-Dearest Lovely

2012

A new year has risen.
And with a new year comes new experiences, decisions, memories, and a new me.
I'm doing better :]
I'm starting to laugh a little more
starting to smile a little more
starting to think and chose for myself
starting to improve myself.

A new year has risen indeed <3

-Dearest Lovely

Work it girl

I need to kick my butt into action and bring my grades up.
I want to push myself out there.
I should stop worrying about others opinions and live my life (within reason)
I have decided to embrace my bohemian style and way of thinking.
And lastly...I will be me.

-Dearest Lovely

All this money can't buy me a time machine.

Can't replace you with a million rings noooo
I shoulda told you what you meant to me woahh
Cause now I pay the price..

Sometimes,
life turns to crap...complete crap and we become so overwhelmed and afraid that we lose ourselves to the point were getting off the ground isn't an option.
But guess what.
it is.

And you know what the best part is?

There's nowhere to go, but UP <3

-Dearest Lovely

Darling I do.

I wanna run away for awhile, to my hometown. Just for a few days and lounge by the beach
I'd wear a dress and simple vintage shoes.
I'd read a book and gaze at the sea, wondering what it was like to live like the fishes, just keep swimming right?

I would take long walks through the forest like I used to when I was little, and remember when everything seemed whole and complete.

Just for a while, even a day.

-Dearest Lovely

This goes out to you Lisa Mary

SO.

I checked my blog today, and happened to take a look at my comments.

And to my surprise a girl I have never seen or met commented on one of my posts.

WOW.

And she said such nice things about me, things that I needed to hear.
Lisa Mary, you are a shining star. Thank you so much for saying the things you did.For sharing your opinion (which I can totally see from your perspective)
For GIVING me some confidence.
And for this moment in time, reminding me that there are still good people in this world.

Thank you <3

-Dearest Lovely

Always Remember

I. HATE. MOVING.

What a pain!

ANNNDDDD we had to down size big time. Which made me think about whats really important to me, having to choose what you love the most and what to throw away. 

Catching on?

I guess what I'm saying is...that always remember what and who you love the most and would do anything for. Because the worldly things... you just can't take to heaven. 

Never forget who's always been there.

Never forget who's loved you unconditionally.

Never forget.

-Dearest Lovely

My Place.

I learned such a good lesson today.

I.AM.SOMEBODY.

Because nobody is a nobody.

And sometimes, I KNOW we forget that.

We forget that we belong
We forget that we have worth
We forget that we all have potential to change this world
We forget that we are each beautiful.

I learned that I need to do my best to never forget that I am, me.
That there is no one else out there like me, I am the only me.
That I was brought on this earth not just because I chose too, but for a reason.
Someone on this earth needs me, I am somebody's everything.

And to whoever takes the time to read this, So are you.

We are who we are, forever and always.

And forever is a long, long time <3

-Dearest Lovely

I've decided.

That I REALLY need to just stop worrying about stuff. 

Even the stupid and petty little things that really don't matter. I also realized that it's hard to tell someone to chill when you know you'd be freaking out in the same situation. Time to walk the talk.

Maybe:

I should just start meditating erryday. I hear it helps.

Just find a quiet place to relax and file my thoughts in the right order, so I can have a moment of sanity and peace. 

Because to me, it feels like on the outside I'm fine, but on the inside? I'm a complete mess, like the little cogs and knobs that were once harmoniously revolving together like a clock have rusted, broken down, and have begun to effect my life.

That IS going to change.

-Dearest Lovely

P.S. I welcome opportunities to learn and strive to be my best and help others. Service is good for the soul.

Hmph.

Today...is...can I say a not so good day?

I discourage myself...a lot. 

And it kills me....a lot.

I have so many out going friends that just do their own thing and are just simply awesome! and the more I think about it, the more I start to realize how un-awesome I am. I DON'T LIKE IT. So some people say, "Well..that's your fault, change it for yourself." 

Because we all know how helpful THAT is. 

SORRY. 

I'm frazzled. I just see no self worth. And I don't feel so comfty just complaining on facebook, sorry follows, your just gonna hafta bear with me.

Another thought. 

I just wanna be better...because I believe that once I love myself I can love others even more, because I'm confident. But I guess that's for me to fix..

Right?

One of my friends says she wants to make a difference. And she inspires me, a lot. and makes me realize that I'll hafta make myself a better person and make changes in my life. Because to be honest...I want to make a difference too...even just once...in someones life.....just one?......please?

I MUST MAKE MY OWN PATH <3

-Dearest Lovely

Welp.

My party? 

Swimmingly smooth just like I said :]

I kina realized that i really prefer quality over quantity, I had such a good time :) 

I'd like to take a moment to thank Madi, Emilee, Alex, Garrett, Ashley, and my family for making it wonderful :)

And an extra thanks to Madi for giving me athletes foot creme :P 

NO.

I do not have athlete's foot.  Medical Anatomy.  You had to be there.

AND just like I said...I got caked in the face! 

Might as well make it a tradition at this point lol.

Ya better run for your life if you can little girl, hide your head in the sand little girl.

-Dearest Lovely

One year older and wiser too, hhhaaaappy birth-day, too you :]

I'm finally 18 :)

I'll be honest...I dont feel much different..but..still.

Brooke says "You're 18! you can buy dry ice! and  propane...and go to jail."

Which are of course my three birthdays wishes :P

Love you Brooke <3

I've gotten sooo many facebook comments!

I.FEEL.LOVED.

I'm so thankful for all the wonderful people in my life; helping me through that tough times and pushing me to do my best <3

I'm hoping this party tonight will go swimmingly smooth :]

I'll be blogging later about every detail.

EVEN

If I get caked in the face :P

Guess we'll find out!

ITS A PARTY WE CAN DANCE IF WE WANT TOO! COME ON AND PARTY LIKE THERE AIN'T  NO CURFEW!

Cause there isn't...cause I'm 18 ;)

-Dearest Lovely

People. Are. Beautiful

Ya know those people that you just see as strikingly beautiful?

Whether their famous or not?

Just how everyone is so wonderfully unique? Special? INcredible?

Here, I'll show you :]

-Dearest Lovely