Sometimes life's intoxicating.

Well, gotta get down on Friday right? It's been such a hard few weeks. Yes, I know. All I seem to be doing lately is complaining, but I've come to think of this as my virtual therapy. A spur the moment virtual piece of paper to just explode all my messy and complicated thoughts on. 

For all the words I couldn't say. 

I am soooo ready to graduate, that whole "Starting over and beginning again" is sounding better and better with each passing month. 

It's like my life has been set in motion for good. Like now I just HAVE to keep going, almost like there's never a break, but I have hope. 

I

WILL

GET 

THROUGH 

THIS.

-Dearest Lovely

On a late note.

I

HAVE

SO

MUCH

GOING

ON.

Kina feels like the world is spinning and spinning and I'm to dizzy to get up.

I wanna be better..I wanna smile too. Why is it so hard? But I guess that's why life is a trial.

Sometimes I sit and think of all the things I'm sorry for, but that's for a later time.

But ya know what? Sometimes, I believe in six impossible things before breakfast.

-Dearest Lovely

I'll be honest

I'll be honest,

It's hard....okay, really hard.

Not to want to have someone, someone to let your know your beautiful, amazing, and someone who won't...well you know, be stupid.

Sometimes I wonder why? I wanna shut myself away in a little box at times. Do I sound dramatic yet? But seriously though, I look at the girls who always seem to have someone liking them; the ones who always have a new man on the horizon....I wonder when the last time was that I ever watched a sunset with a guy...but I digress.

ANYWAY, then there's those moments. Ya know. When the optimism sets in and your like "Men? Who cares? NOT ME,"  But let's not lie to ourselves, after awhile...we do. Everyone does. Love, the very word makes my heart ache, when? Why doesn't come faster for me! That is the question indeed. 

So really what I'm saying is that I WANT A MAN....but not really...but I do. 

See there's these things called emotions, they kind of mess with your mind; I think sometimes just to see how far they can push you. Joy. 

But once again, I digress.

-Dearest Lovely